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Haverhill Missed Connection: Mr. Meh, You’ll Do

January 10th, 2011 by

It’s been a while since I’ve trawled Craigslist’s missed connections for fun and blog fodder. Remember how spectacular the results were last time?

Just like last time, while most of the posts ranged from sweet to satire, one really jumped out at me:

(click for full size)

Some enchanted evening (in 2009) you will see a stranger…but why don’t you just hold that thought until 2011?

It’s nice to see a missed connection for possibly the least compelling man in the universe. I mean, maybe this guy really is “gorgeous,” but obviously whatever he’s selling doesn’t look like it’s flying off the shelf too fast, otherwise, why would anyone wait such a long-ass time to grab him?

At least the girl posting is realistic, if not super slow to react. (Though kudos to her for remembering not only seeing a cute guy on that particular night, but what color t-shirt the guy was wearing. Summer nights can often get…fuzzy.)  Sure, chances of finding Mr. Right are slim.  But, Mr. Close Enough is cool, too. Any emo-haired yellow t-shirt clad Asians out there looking to get it on with a totally passive punk rock chick? Here’s your chance!

All jokes aside- if you’re out there, pining poster, I hope 2011 is the year you finally find the man of your dreams. Or at least a reasonable facsimile.

Hot in herre: Firemen Singles Party at Evenfall

June 9th, 2010 by

From the sound of it, things are really heating up over at Evenfall, where as we speak UNWEDnesdays is hosting a Firemen Singles Party. We couldn’t be there ourselves tonight, so we sent our stealth photographer (cough Spiro cough) to get a few snaps of the action.

Firemen and the ladies who love them gathering at Evenfall's lounge.

Reports of some serious sizzle are not surprising, given the dark, romantic vibe of Evenfall’s lounge. Not to mention,  ladies love a man in uniform, and what lovelorn man in uniform wouldn’t appreciate a room full of admiring ladies? Put all of these factors together and you have a towering inferno of brilliance.

Hot fireman sandwich: New bar bite?

Also, a tip of the hat to the person who wrote this amazing copy promoting the event:

A game of shoots and ladders takes on a whole new meaning at the second of our Fireman Singles Parties…lavishing attention on the area’s bravest men ain’t so hard with a dance beat, complimentary appetizers, sponsorship by Bacardi and a chance to hit the town on us with your favorite man in uniform.

As great food + inspired cocktails + dance music + buff guys = recipe for success, I have no doubt Spiro and the gang will be fanning the flames of love for these smitten kittens again soon. So put $10 under your pillow and get ready to mark your calendars. We’ll update you when the next Firemen Singles Party comes to town.

Hearts afire?

Personally, I’d go with Veronica…

May 29th, 2010 by

…but that’s just me.

Last week, we learned that Haverhill’s Bradford College was the basis for spooky Miskatanic University in H.P. Lovecraft’s stories.

However, Lovecraft was not the only writer inspired by the Shoe City: Bob Montana, the creator of Archie Comics lived in Bradford and attended Haverhill High for three years.

Guess where he got the inspiration for his characters and settings?

Two Girls, One Archie

That’s right – Bob based the characters on his classmates and the locations of his favorite Haverhill hang-outs.  From Wikipedia:

His friends Skinny Linehan and Arnold Daggett were the basis for Jughead Jones and Moose Mason respectively. School librarian Elizabeth Tuck inspired Miss Grundy and principal Earl McLeod was the model for Mr. Weatherbee….Pop Tate’s Chocklit Shoppe, a soda shop where Archie’s Gang hang out, was based on real-life locations frequented by Haverhill teenagers during the 1930s — Crown Confectionery and the Chocolate Shop on Merrimack Street and the Tuscarora on Winter Street.

Man, I wish I had friends named ‘Skinny Linehan’ in High School. (Side Note: If you happen to KNOW Skinny – then let us know. We’d love to talk to him!)

Good choice, my man (It was all a dream...)

After 69 years, the story of an ageless small town high school love triangle is still going strong.

But I guess that’s what the kids are into these days.

And in honor of Archie Comics and today being Caturday – here is a picture of my cat Archie* reading a comic book:

Ironically, he's reading 'Mice Templar'

*He is named for Archimedes, not Archie Andrews.

I Love Falafel

May 11th, 2010 by

Every city needs a place with good falafel.

Lucky for us, we have J.J.’s Kabob and Pizzeria on River Street.

443 River Street

To be honest, my favorite item at J.J.’s is the hummus:

So so creamy.

I could honestly eat the hummus until it was coming out of my ears. The only drawback is that you might not get enough pita bread for dipping but fear not: this stuff goes great on your falafel wrap too.

The falafel comes wrapped in a tidy pita with pickles, onions, lettuce, and tomatoes.

Very filling.

If you thought Cosmic Amanda chowing down on a burrito from Tacos Lupitas was a sight to see – then me eating one of these is downright pornographic.

Thankfully, there is no video evidence to prove this claim.


Unfortunately, J.J.’s is closed on Sundays because I think it’s a law that any establishment in Haverhill must have weird business hours.

Epic Haverhill missed connection

April 27th, 2010 by

Since Haverhill is without a subway system or more than one Starbucks, I was shocked to see how many missed connections the Shoe City is home to. Well, maybe it’s not the quantity as much as the quality.

If you’re a lady who loves the feel of the wheel, Fidel Castro, or simply tall and hot, there may be a lovelorn person currently looking for you.

Far and away, this has to be the most visually epic missed connection I’ve ever seen anywhere. Way to go, Haverhill!

Perhaps the greatest missed connection of all times.

I sincerely hope this guy finds who he’s looking for. In the meantime, I think I’m about to post a missed connection for that amazing fez!