Sometimes a crime is committed that is so heinous that it becomes instant legend, word spreading from cube to cube, valley to valley, leaving all who hear of it to shake their heads in disbelief and wonder “why?”
Honestly, I didn’t think the dismemberment of a 7-foot tall gingerbread man was one of those times.
However, news of Haverhill’s first homicide of a fairytale creature captured the rapt attention of the entire region after being featured on both NECN and Fox News. I think we all collectively chuckled cried a silent tear as footage of the pieces of plywood gingerbread being taken away from the crime scene rolled. Then Haverhill got back down to business downtown (including apprehending the culprit(s) via means usually not even reserved for home break-ins, apparently) and that was that. Our moment of infamy had subsided.
Until this morning when an eagle-eyed tipster sent us this screen cap from the blog of world renowned deal-a-day site, Woot.com:
Woot Blog coverage of Ginger Gate (click to see full entry)
Holy cow! We’re, like, Internet famous now! (Plus, that is such a spot on tip…GIANT TALKING FOX! Of course!)
Elsewhere on the Interwebs, one writer at the SOP (Student Operated Press) takes a hard line on the cookie capital punishment, contending that the gingerbread dismemberment was a mercy killing:
No civilized community should tolerate a gigantic gingerbread man; the person responsible for its destruction should be awarded a key to they city. And the students who created the monstrosity should be reprimanded for doing the devil`s work.
And I know my life wasn’t complete until I saw that the story had made it’s way to my favorite Web site, www.everythinggingerbreadman.com.
But in all seriousness, let’s talk lemonade here, people…this is pretty darn cool! Haverhill is really on the map now!
My only warning after all this Internet infamy is that we not let all this go to our heads and start slaughtering bedtime counting sheep or golden geese or anything like that just for media attention. Let’s turn this negative into a positive, shall we? I suggest setting up a memorial scholarship fund to benefit one lucky ginger-American student each year.