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Doug not know Peter feel that way…this awkward.

April 4th, 2010 by

Peter Love Doug

Just like regular men, 1 in 10 cavemen are homosexual.

(graffiti found on Essex St.)

Street Art, She Wrote

March 31st, 2010 by

While you were busy pumping out your basement this week, this Bradford resident was doing a bit of super sleuthing…

There’s been a mystery baffling me since late fall. You see, one night back in November, I was driving home after an especially soul-crushing day spent languishing in my cubicle, when I rounded a corner on 125 and came face to face with this:

“Whaaaaat!?” I thought. Then I had to pull over to the side of the road I was laughing so hard. This is nearly Banksy-level shizz! Right here in Bradford! Amazing!

This moment was the very first to give me hope for the coolness of my city.

Ever since that fateful night, I’ve been keeping an eye out similar acts of awesomeness, all the while dying to know who the responsible party might be.

So, while it’s been pouring buckets these past few days I’ve been on a mission to uncover the truth…and I finally cracked the case!

While I can’t explain my investigative methods, for fear of spoiling the anonymity of the street artists behind the billboard hack, I did get the scoop on their motivation.

Says one of the artists:

“We’re into finding places to explore and leaving our mark in subtle ways that are more for humor than anything else. Obviously in this case it was just taking a jab at a bad comedian haha.

For instance, if we see a face that we find funny on a billboard or wherever, we’ll oftentimes dash out to the billboard in the dead of night, cut out the face using a box cutter, and then, using wallpaper glue, paste the face somewhere obscure and random, where if someone sees it, it’ll make their day. We don’t like these things to be too obvious, because we want it to stay up for at least a little while, so we tend to put them in areas people don’t tend to look in (but it’s usually something ballsy like the inside of an overpass on the highway or side of a bridge.)

So, if you have ever passed a billboard with it’s face cut-out (like that one in Bradford that they put up three times)… That’s us. Just a bunch of dudes having fun and trying to make people laugh or go ‘what??’ without spray painting or doing any permanent damage to anything. It’s all pretty ephemeral stuff, but I guess it’s sorta like building a sandcastle in that it’s fun to do anyway.”

So, there you have it. Case closed!

And, I really shouldn’t brag about my sweet detective skills, so I’ll defer to our mystery artist once again:

“By the way, really good detective work on your part. Bravo.”

Sunday Shoppin’: Jennie’s Inc.

March 28th, 2010 by

Conveniently located next to Haverhill’s foremost bepper emporium, Jennie’s Inc. unassumingly occupies 133 Merrimack St., its humble exterior barely hinting at its interior largess-  which is, like, absolute junk store heaven.

Jennie's Inc.

As I once Yelped, the selection of amazing finds at mind bogglingly low prices is so vast, you’ll think you were flattened by a be-spoilered*  Civic on your way over from the Salvation Army. I never thought I’d survive another long, cold, flea market-less winter until I stepped foot inside this awesome co-op.

Let’s take a look at just a few of the delightful bargains we encountered this afternoon, shall we?

Scotty needs love, too!
Nerd smut!

Old dude bag- $2.95
Possibly unintentional political satire!

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Hipster watermelon piñata!

We also found something labeled “imagination stick” for only $2.00.  I’ll let you draw your own (no-doubt more tawdry) conclusions there.

FIRST HAVERHILL FEVER CONTEST: Find, purchase, and photograph the aforementioned object and you will win a Haverhill Fever t-shirt!**

Today, I scored an antique schoolhouse chair ($6.00), a portrait of the 8th grade class of Pratville, circa 1908 ($5.00), and a vintage Royal Japan sailor decanter (Listed for $40 on eBay) for, um hello, only $3.00!

If you’re a lover of antiques, weird stuff, or simply dig a good rummage, be sure to check out Jennie’s Inc. at 133 Merrimack St.  in Haverhill.

Just please leave some bargains for me, okay?

Souvenir of Haverhill, Mass.

* totally made up word which means “to which an aftermarket spoiler has been affixed”

* *Haverhill Fever t-shirts do not actually exist.

Haverhillebrities: Tom Bergeron!

March 24th, 2010 by

A city is only as cool as the celebrities it spawns, right? Well then, Haverhill is officially a big bag of awesome, because we can lay claim to America’s second funniest host of America’s Funniest Home Videos: Tom Bergeron!

Born and raised in Haverhill, Tom made his mark on the city at 17 as the youngest deejay ever to hit the airwaves at WHAV.  “Hey, I started doing radio when I was 17” I thought, and instantly felt totally cool! Of course, then I remembered that while Tom would go on to host Granite State Challenge, People Are Talking, Good Morning America, Hollywood Squares, Dancing with the Stars, etc etc, I went on to be sitting here waxing poetic in some dumb blog about how cool Tom Bergeron is.

*cough*

The opening paragraph on Tom’s Wikipedia page lists the top 3 most important things to know about him, and they are:

  • He has hosted a ton of shows.
  • He won a Daytime Emmy he’s so good!
  • Dude was born in Haverhill.

‘Nuff said.

Um,  somebody hand me the duct tape, because Tom Bergeron is RIPPED!

Beautiful abandonment

March 22nd, 2010 by

I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve driven by and never really noticed this small, neglected shop, but I recognized it the second I saw this photo by Jeremiah True.

Jeremiah True: Abandoned Store Front

So much of Haverhill is shuttered, it can feel pretty bleak at times. But, there’s something beautiful in all this abandonment.

On one hand, the downtown is oozing with character, and there’s vast potential for restoration, rehabilitation and development of our unique city.  I moved here because I wanted to be in on the ground floor of this turn around. If you’re reading this blog, are you with me?

On the other hand, while I’d love to see this building transformed into a quirky yarn store or maybe even a coffee shop, part of me loves it just the way it stands-  evidence of all that’s transpired since the Haverhill that once was.

Here are a couple more of my favorites- *sigh* They almost make me want to petition for Haverhill to maintain an official “abandoned district.”

Jeremiah True: Shuttered Diner

Jeremiah True: Mill Building Reflection #1

Jeremiah True: F.W. Woolworth's Loading Dock

You can see more of downtown Haverhill in all of its eerie nighttime  glory in Jeremiah’s flickr photostream. Be sure to check out his Forty Days of Photography project, which also features some really nice, moody shots of Bradford and nearby Lawrence, Amesbury and Newburyport.

Beppers & Cellular

March 22nd, 2010 by

Beppers & Cellular

Downtown <3:  Misspelled outdated technology for sale!